A Very Old Lady Entered A Crowded Bus
I was on a very crowded bus and an old woman with a walker got on. Can you give me as many reasons why you deserve the seat more?” Sadly, only one. I’m the freakin’ driver.”
Johnny And A Girl Are Playing
Little Johnny and a little girl are playing. Little Johnny pulls down his shorts and says, “I have one of these and you don’t.” “My mother told me,” says the little girl, pulling up her dress, “that with one of…
A Man Was Walking Home
An Irishman was walking home late at night and saw a woman in the dark shadows. ‘Twenty pounds,’ she whispers. ‘Oh, I’m sorry,’ says the cop, ‘I didn’t know.’ ‘Well, neither did I, til ya shined that bloody light in…
Johnny Got On The Bus
A little Johnny got on the bus, sat next to a man reading a book, and noticed he had his collar backward. The Little boy said, “My Dad has 4 boys, 4 girls and two grandchildren and he doesn’t wear…
Two Gas Men Were Out Checking Meters
Two gas company servicemen, a senior training supervisor and a young trainee, were out checking meters in a suburban neighborhood. They stopped and asked her what was wrong. Gasping for breath, she replied, “When I see two gas men running…
An Old Cowboy Walks Into A Saloon
An old Cowboy Walks Into a Saloon, Naked….except for his boots. “Where are your clothes at, Slim?”, asks the one man Back at the barn. Fellers, she had the most bodacious body I had ever seen! I said, ‘Yes, ma’am,…
An Old Fella Was Celebrating 92 Years On This Earth
An old fella was celebrating 92 years on this earth. He spoke to his toes. “Hello, toes.”, he said. Then, he looked down at his cr0tch. “Hello, W!llie! You little bugger. Just think. If you were alive today, you’d be…
A Census Taker In A Rural Area
A census taker in a rural area went up to a farmhouse and knocked. When an old woman came to the door, he asked her how many children she had and their ages.
Two Men Went Bear Hunting
Two men went bear hunting. While one stayed in the cabin, the other went out looking for a bear. The man jumped up, closed the cabin door and yelled to his friend inside, “You skin this one while I go…
A Man Had Settled Into His Seat Next To The Window Seat
A man had just settled into his seat next to the window on the plane when another man sat down in the aisle seat and put his black Labrador Retriever in the middle seat next to the man. Sniffer then…
A Young Boy Is Pulling His Wagon Up A Hill
A young boy is pulling his wagon up a hill when one of the back wheels falls off and rolls down the hill. The wheel stops rolling, turns around, rolls back up the hill and puts itself back on the wagon….
Chester And Earl Went Hunting
Chester and Earl are going hunting. Chester says to Earl, I’ll send my dog out to see if there are any ducks out in the pond. If there aren’t any ducks out there, I’m not going hunting.” So Earl goes to the breeder and…