A guy comes home completely drunk after visiting the Golden Saloon A guy comes home completely drunk one night. “Is this the Golden Saloon?” she asks when the bartender answers the phone. “Yes, it is,” the bartender answers. “Do you…
A 92-year-old man went to the doctor for his annual check-up. The doctor asked the man how he was feeling, and the 92-year-old said, “Things are great, and I’ve never felt better!” “By now, he realized he had left his…
They had great seats right behind their team’s bench. After the game, he asked her how she liked it. ‘Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback!’ I’m like…Helloooooo? It’s only 25 cents!”
The husband comes home and is worried because he has a scratch on his chest caused by a fingernail from his mistress, opens the door sees the cat asleep on the couch, and gives him a tremendous kick.
All the organs of the body were having a meeting, trying to decide who was the one in charge…… “I should be in charge,” said the rectum, “Because I’m responsible for waste removal.” All the other body parts laughed at…
A little boy hears the word wh****rehouse in school and asks his father what it means. His father is quite shocked, and replies: “Well, uh… you go there to… have a good time.” Later that night he comes home, his…
A young woman goes to her boyfriend’s parent’s house for Thanksgiving dinner. This is to be her first time meeting his family, and she is very nervous. Her boyfriend’s father looked over at the family dog that had been snoozing…
A female secretary was helping her new boss set up his computer and asked him what word he would like to use as a password to log in.
A blonde arrived for her first golf lesson and the pro asked her to take a swing at a ball to see how she’d do.
Three women are about to be executed for crimes. One’s a brunette, one’s a redhead, and one’s a blonde. Two guards bring the brunette forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. By this point, the blonde…