An old fella was celebrating 92 years on this earth. He spoke to his toes. “Hello, toes.”, he said. Then, he looked down at his cr0tch. “Hello, W!llie! You little bugger. Just think. If you were alive today, you’d be…
A census taker in a rural area went up to a farmhouse and knocked. When an old woman came to the door, he asked her how many children she had and their ages.
Two men went bear hunting. While one stayed in the cabin, the other went out looking for a bear. The man jumped up, closed the cabin door and yelled to his friend inside, “You skin this one while I go…
A man had just settled into his seat next to the window on the plane when another man sat down in the aisle seat and put his black Labrador Retriever in the middle seat next to the man. Sniffer then…
A young boy is pulling his wagon up a hill when one of the back wheels falls off and rolls down the hill. The wheel stops rolling, turns around, rolls back up the hill and puts itself back on the wagon….
Chester and Earl are going hunting. Chester says to Earl, I’ll send my dog out to see if there are any ducks out in the pond. If there aren’t any ducks out there, I’m not going hunting.” So Earl goes to the breeder and…
An elderly man traveling by plane was in urgent need of a restroom facility. But each time he tried, it was occupied. So a little more boldly he pressed the WA button and body temperature Warm Air blew across his…
An attorney went into a bar for a Martini and found himself beside a scruffy-looking old drunk who kept mumbling and studying something in his hand. The attorney responded, “Let me take a look.” So the old drunk handed it…
A man went to visit his 90-year-old grandfather in a very secluded rural area of the state he lived in. “Are you sure these plates are clean”? Without looking up from his hamburger, the grandfather says, “I told you before;…
A young lad was tired of the farm life; so off he went and joined the Navy. “six bells hit the deck”, “six bells hit the deck” Well the old sailor was quite angry, and told the parrot I can’t…
An elderly woman from California purchased a piece of timberland in Oregon. There was a large tree on one of the highest points in the tract. She sat and waited for three hours before the doctor reappeared. The angry woman…
A little old lady went to the grocery store and put the most expensive cat food in her basket. The next day, the old lady went to the store and bought 12 of the most expensive dog cookies. The cashier…