The Bear Remover

Burt lives in Jackson, Wyoming. One morning he wakes up to find a bear on his roof.

He looks in the Yellow Pages and sure enough, there’s an ad for ‘Bear Removers’.

Burt calls the number, and Eric, the bear remover says he’ll be over in 30 minutes.

Sure enough, Eric arrives on time and gets out of his van.

He’s got a ladder, a baseball bat, a shotgun and a mean old pit bull.

“What are you going to do?” asks a worried Burt.

“I’m going to put this ladder up against the roof,

Then I’m going to go up there and knock the bear off the roof with this baseball bat.

When the bear falls off, the pit bull is trained to grab his testicles and not let go. The bear will then be subdued enough for me to put him in the cage in the back of the van.”

He hands the shotgun to Burt.

“What’s the shotgun for?” he asks.

“If the bear knocks me off the roof, shoot the dog.”


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